Involving Your Family in Your Wedding Plans

April 17, 2014 • Tips For Brides, Wedding Resources • Views: 47122

Family Wedding Photo

Image courtesy of Kern Photo

Weddings are the joining of two families and the forming of a new one. You would be remiss if you didn’t consider involving your family in your wedding plans. They can offer a huge amount of support and help and offer creative ideas. Family though can add a challenging twist to the planning process. With some careful thought on your part, you can get their help and make them feel included and valuable. 

Ask them what they want to do

Certain members may or may not actually want to be involved. Plan time to grab coffee or lunch with them to see what aspects of the wedding they’d like to be a part of. Maybe your aunt has a hidden skill that you could use. Maybe your sister or cousin would prefer a behind-the-scenes role as opposed to a public role. Knowing in advance will give you an idea of how they can help.

Be specific

Most people do well with a specific task. It helps them feel successful and keeps you from getting frustrated. For example, if you want help assembling favors, give them all the supplies and give them a completed favor so they know exactly how you want it done. This also ensures you get what you want.

Bank on their strengths

Do you have a family member who is a great cook? Maybe he or she can prepare a day-of-snack for the bridal party. Is your cousin a great photographer? Have her shoot photos at the rehearsal. Depending on your comfort level, your family can also tackle larger tasks or assume more responsibility. Just be sure they’re willing and you make clear your expectations.

Be diplomatic

Sometimes involving family is done to help keep the peace. Luckily, there’s a variety of things for your family to do during the planning process and on the wedding day. No matter how small the task, it’ll make them feel valued. Your great aunt who’s close with your parents but whom you barely know could man the guestbook. Be aware of those family members who want to help and do your best to involve them in your big day.


Your immediate family members are the perfect people to give tasks to. Assign large tasks to them such as picking and making favors and let them be creative with getting them done. You might have to release control and trust them. In the long run, it’ll help reduce your workload and stress. Be sure to check in often and express your gratitude.

Great tasks for family

Depending on your comfort level and your family’s skill level, here’s a list of things they can help with:

Low-level involvement

  • Manning the guestbook
  • Serving cake
  • Dropping off invitations at the post office
  • Handing out programs
  • Picking up your dress or tuxedos
  • Returning tuxedos after the wedding
  • Doing a reading during the ceremony

Mid-level involvement

  • Providing day-of transportation
  • Creating centerpieces
  • Assembling favors
  • Addressing your invitations
  • Helping setup or teardown of the ceremony and reception

High-level involvement

  • Picking up or returning rental chairs and tables
  • Acting as wedding coordinator
  • Shooting photos as the wedding photographer
  • Being in charge of sound on the wedding day
  • Catering the reception
  • Making your cake
  • Sewing bridesmaids or flower girl dresses

Family can be a huge asset when it comes to planning your wedding. Make sure you’re open and honest in your communication and check in with them often. Don’t forget to thank them for all their help after the wedding!

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